Overwhelmed!

Heyooo,

As some of you may remember from a few of my last posts, I’m now a senior! That’s right. And it’s been a whole month since school started, and trust me, I’m already feeling it.

I feel like so many people had lied to me telling me how Senior year would be the bet and most laid back year. Well, it wasn’t necessarily a lie. That very well might have been true for them. But I chose the other path and let my tell you, I am STRESSED OUT!

I feel like there’s so much going on right now! Aside from family issues going on that I don’t feel like getting into, there’s the whole dilemma with friends. You see, I don’t exactly have a friend group, I’m just friends with random people and most of them aren’t friends with each other and of course that causes problems when it comes to any sort of event. For example, at lunch I might find someone I know to eat with, but that person has their own friend group and I feel like the odd man out. And it’s the same way with any group I intrude in. This gives a general feeling of loneliness.

There’s a whole other layer of stress that comes from being in a long term relationship. Sure, through it all, he’s my support and my source of relaxation. However, there is a big stress that comes with the happiness of the other person. If there is something wrong or something  going on with that person, it feels like that problem is happening to you as well. So if there’s something wrong with one person, it’s like exponential. Someone is sad and the other person gets sad, but then the first person feels more sad because they made their partner sad and it’s a vicious cycle that leads to lots of stress. The problem in this case is that he broke his right wrist. That means that he can’t play his sport (which is like his life) which of course makes him upset and begins the cycle I just described.

Secondly is something I just brought upon myself. And that is school. Most kids decide that since senior year grades aren’t all too important when applying for colleges, they take fewer and easier classes. And then there are people like me, who do their best to pack their schedule with the hardest classes the school can offer. I can’t help it! That’s just the way it’s always been. Regular classes have just been a bore and a burden. So I have 4 APs which isn’t a lot for some people, but I’ve been drowning. I already had to drop a class because I was getting straight F’s and I didn’t want that on my transcript. I know, I’m a coward, but oh well. So yes, there has been a constant flow of reading, and projects, and tests and it’s getting into my head! I’m lucky that many of my classes overlap in what they teach, because if they didn’t, I would be so lost. And going back into how I dropped a class, that means that I just transferred into a completely new class and I’m already SO FAR BEHIND. And it’s stressful trying to play catch up for a whole month of work.

Then there is the idea of APPLICATIONS! Okay, it’s mostly just time consuming. I got most of the basic stuff finished, but what’s really eating at me is…. The essays. Writing about myself?! I know, I know, you guys are thinking that I do that on here all the time, but this is pretty trivial stuff when I want to actually define who I am. I don’t think I even know who I am. And I have to somehow tell some people who have never met me in a mere 1000 words. It’s stressful. For those of you who have gone through the process, I’m sure you agree with me and for those who haven’t, you have something to look forward to (sarcasm).

So yes. I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed. I want to do everything and I want to do everything well, but I’ve put so much on my plate that I feel like I’m cutting corners on EVERYTHING. It’s not Senioritis, I swear! I haven’t stopped trying, I’m just falling behind and that’s a scary feeling.

Thank you so much for lending an ear and listening to my rant! You all deserve great big hugs!!! Well until next time, loves!

Your stressed out blogger,

Sabrina

Love

Hello WordPress users!

Sabrina’s back yet again with another burning message for the masses. And by masses I mean the 3 people who actually read this blog.

I want to talk about love! So have you ever loved someone so extremely much that just the mere thought of losing them makes you physically ill? I consider myself so extremely lucky to have experienced a love this strong in my life.

I’m sure right now you all are thinking “Oh yes. Sabrina told us she was seeing someone romantically, she must be talking about him.” I mean, yes I love him a lot. But this particular post is in fact NOT about him. I want to talk about my best friend.

Some events last week caused my friend and me to get into a fight. It really was a small thing. Misunderstandings and pent up feelings just expanded the situation and suddenly we were pissed. The very existence of our friendship was put into debate.

The effects of this fight were immediately visible. She is a physically weaker girl and the effects were terrible on her. She ended up not coming to school for a few days because the fear of losing me had manifested itself in high fever and some other symptoms. In myself, I also became sick. I was almost constantly shaking and woozy as well as having to make quick trips to the bathroom to avoid spilling chunks on the classroom floor. But I still went to school because 1) I didn’t want to explain to my parents what was wrong and 2) I absolutely HATE missing school.

So yes. It’s a scary thing when something so important that you seemed so sure of becomes questionable. Being the Sabrina I am, I immediately blamed myself. She is so important to me.

In the end, we finally straightened it out. As I said, it was just a big misunderstanding, and though some hurtful things might have been said, those things were things we needed to hear. They were truths about ourselves that we now better understand.

The point of this whole post is to say how thankful I am. How amazing it is to have someone on this earth to be so connected to. Honestly we’ve both worked in ways to better each other and without her, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. And it truly is an amazing feeling, to have someone care about you as much as she cares about me. It really does make me feel like I have strength to face any situation.

So though friendships go up and down, I think they are some of the purist love you will find. We’re sisters and we’ll love each other through it all. Thank you.

Your Faux-Sis,

Sabrina

Lost

Hello my fellow internet users!

It’s Sabrina! That girl you haven’t heard from in almost a year. Sorry about that, needed a little sabbatical with all the school work and other things I had going on, and of course procrastination. This is by no means a promise that I will post more often or anything of that sort, but there was something on my mind that I felt I wanted to share.

Have you ever lost something important to you? I’m sure most of you have. Some sort of object with monetary or sentimental value. Such as earlier this year when I lost a ring given to me by one of my best friends. Or perhaps it was not something, but rather someone. Like a parent, sibling, or friend. Or maybe it wasn’t as much of a physical object rather than an idea. Such as motivation, beliefs, trust, or goals.

It dawned on me the other day, that I was soon to become a senior!! Geez! I started this back in Freshman year when I wrote every day. And now I’m almost done. But a Senior. I was thinking back on my experiences as a high schooler and I got very nostalgic. More than that, I became sad.

I was talking to my parents the other day and they seemed confused about why I would rather spend time with my friends than with them. I said because my friends are always there for me and I trust them more. Hurtful, right? But then again, I’ve never had the best relationship with my parents. They understood, but then they said something that got me thinking. They’re always going to be my parents no matter what, but my friends will come and go.

I thought about all the friends I’ve ever had in my life. And I became sad as their words rang true. I can remember back to preschool. My best friend. I did everything with her. My parents and her parents became closer through our friendship, but as we grew we went into different school systems an became influenced by different people. The next time I saw her she seemed so different, but I must’ve seemed different too. She no longer acted like someone I would want to befriend. And just like that, we grew apart.

My next “best friend” moved to Utah. I never heard from her again after that. Being a youngster I was, I didn’t have an email or cellphone to contact her and like that, she disappeared from my life.

Then a new friend. She was like a sister to me. We grew so close, but then she moved even further this time. To Australia. As she became molded by Australian society she also changed. She grew to become someone I could no longer recognize. And the time difference caused us to not be able to talk until all that could be heard from my so called sister was silence.

Next. Some of you may remember this one from earlier on in my blog if you’ve been following it for a while. I loved her. I was like a growth from her body. I looked up to her so much and she was a great friend. But misunderstandings and just small differences seemed to pile up to the point where everything became a conflict. Then she went to a different school. After that, I barely heard from her. In fact, my entire little posse from middle school rarely talks to me.

Again. A male friend this time. And no this isn’t as cliche as you’d think. The way it ended was because of me becoming interested in someone. And he felt that he shouldn’t be so close to me while I was with someone else. And so he distanced himself. I loved him, but now we pass as almost strangers in the hallway.

I recently had another best friend of an opposite gender. And this one, I’m sure you could foresee. We became so close. I loved him and talked to him for hours. Like my other friends keeping him updated and laughing with him. But then of course the complications arose when unshared romantic feelings came into the equation and I lost him as well.

I felt at this point that I had lost more than just the string of friends. Each one of those friends took a chunk of me with them as they left. I felt barely whole because I lost so much. I had dedicated so much time and effort and love into these people who so easily walked out of my life. I had lost more than my friends. I’d lost myself. I didn’t feel like the same Sabrina that I used to be.

Friends who had promised me they wouldn’t leave. Friends who had made wonderful plans with me for the future. All these friends were now lost. We went out separate ways and will look back on our time together fondly, but it’s over. I won’t ever get the love I gave them back. I won’t ever get the tie I devoted to them back. I won’t ever get that bond we had together back. The only thing I can do is close my eyes and bulldoze onward and hope there is a time when someone who isn’t family can be more than temporary.

It’s sad to think I’ve lost so many people I cared about. From time to time, I try to reach out to them, but I know that it can’t ever be the same. It’s lost. And it makes me sad. But perhaps it’s something I just need to accept.

I know this wasn’t the kind of post you’re used to. But this was just what was on my mind.

So you see, I have this word document where I saved little uplifting text messages, emails, and facebook messages that my friends have sent me. I was looking at it and some of those quotes can still bring me to tears. But what is even more sad is that most of these people won’t even say hi to me if they saw me anymore. Those people who had cared so much about me to send such sweet messages now don’t care to even wave.

It’s all very sad, but through it all I still have the friends I have now. And sure they’re nothing like the friends I’ve lost but they’re unique in their own way. And maybe someday we’ll become strangers again, but in the meantime, I’m going to try my best to enjoy the friendship we have now so that someday I can look back on the time we had together and smile.

Thank you for listening to my little rant!! You guys are the best (though I’m not quite sure anyone’s really reading this anymore) Well I might talk to you later if there’s something on my mind. But for now, goodbye!

Searchin the lost and found,

Sabrina <3

 

Getcho Spook On!

Howdy Doo!

So how were all you guy’s days? I hope they were great. And yes, I really do care, so you can leave a comment. I mean…If you wanna. Wow. What a demanding way to start off a post… Well anywho…

I posted twice yesterday! Y’all should be proud of me. Goodness what a sad life. Well anyway, I was very nearly late to school! Gasp! A cleaning lady was coming to our house today and so my mother spent most of the morning bossing me around and telling me to make my room tidier so it would be easier for the cleaning lady. In my opinion, isn’t that what we pay her to do? Well either way, I got on campus as the first be rang, meaning I had 5 minutes to get across campus. I made it! So hah!

When I’m trying to explain school concepts to my friends, I always go into this really weird mode of talking. I mean, I honestly don’t talk like that colloquially, but I guess I feel like it makes it easier to remember if I use slang I had a friend like that, but she used a lot of curse words. Since I don’t curse, mine ends up more along the lines of: “An inhibitor sows or stops a reaction. They be like ‘NOPE!’ They be competitive of non-competitive. The competitive be like ‘Yo, this be my active site and Imma just sit here and do nothin, blockin all y’all from reactin’ and then non-competitive’s like ‘Yo imma just hook up with this enzyme and totes screw up his activation site. Now y’all can’t hook up. Sucks to suck.'” And yeah… that’s my description of an inhibitor… The more you know.

Other than that, our school’s advanced math class got a little festive and decided to decorate our math classroom for Halloween. Our math teacher is like a millionaire so his room already has some pretty cool decor,  but man, these kids went all out. There were flying bats, singing corpses, bubbling cauldrons, flying demons, and spiderwebs galore. It really was magnificent. To top it all off, they left us a little riddle/ challenge as well. It was something about about “Here’s the demand, lend us a hand. Find the five, and you’ll come out alive” Written on the whiteboard. 5 plastic fingers were hidden around the room. Our period was 2nd to have a crack at it and we found 4 of the 5 fingers. Not bad if you ask me.

You guys! YOU GUYS! I got my Halloween costume today! I wish you would comment guessing what it is (for those of you who I haven’t told yet)

How many of you guys have been looking at the news lately? Okay, I would start going into the government shutdown and all that jazz, but no, this is a comedy blog. So instead I’m going to tell you about how my Spanish teacher makes us report about current events in Hispanic countries. So basically, we listened to news all period. It just truck me that all the news was pretty depressing. I mean, honestly. It was pretty terrible to sit through. Who else has noticed this? I want some happy news!

I’m doing a dance. And by that, I mean yes, a choreographed dance. For a Christmas show. And no, not like in Mean Girls. I don’t roll that way. But basically, it’s going to be difficult. But somehow I’m pretty excited. Eh. I don’t really know anyone else doing it, but should be fun… and tiring. At least I get some form of exercise for once.

In one science class, we did a lab where we had o count cars in the parking lot. Nice little fun fact: I love walking around campus without a backpack. I mean, we have an outdoor campus and so everything i just so beautiful. And of course the weather was nice. My friends and I were just lazing about campus and singing random songs as loud as we wanted.Everyone else was in class so no one could judge us. Gotta say, it was a nice end to the school day.

Hm… other than that, my best friend is turning 18 tomorrow! We’re all getting so old. Officially an adult. I’m busy with prep. Been out shopping for a while. Hence the late post.

I actually have a math test I should be studying for so I’m going to log off for now. I’ll try to post later. Like, comment, and follow if you liked this post!! Also you can ask me a question. ANY question on my ask.fm page with is LINKED HERE. Hope you all have a great rest of the day (though there isn’t all too much left) Bye!

Your Peaceful Procrastinator,

Sabrina

Ask Sabrina #4

Who’s your new lover? What’s his nationality?
Alright you guys, the cat’s out of the bag. His codename was Kyle. Now go look him up in past posts. We know you want to. And also, he’s so many nationalities that I’m not even sure how to answer that. How about….white…

What do you want to be when you grow up?
I have two answers on two totally different sides o the spectrum, on one end is an oncologist or any type of doctor that isn’t a surgeon and then on the other side is a math teacher. Or just a teacher.

are you a virgin till when do you plan on being one??
Yes I am. And until I’m married.
 
whats your fav taylor swift song
Either Innocent from the album Speak Now or Mary’s Song (Oh My My My) from the album Taylor Swift.
 
Have you ever stuffed your bra?
Nope! Proud to say that. Not even to make if roe comfortable or whatever.
 
why are we here
To make a legacy and a difference in other people’s lives so that even after we go, we will still live on in the memories of others and the after effects of our accomplishments.
 
who are you., who am i
I am Sabrina, a blogger. And as for you, you are you, an anonymous reader with a strange question.
 
what is love?
Very tempted to just say “Baby don’t hurt me” and leave it at that. But in the slim chance that you wanted my answer to this, It’s that feeling where you deeply care for someone. You accept them for who they are no matter what and put their own happiness above your own.
 
if i was a potato would i be a hot potato?
Most definitely. In fact, you’d burn my tongue sweetheart. *wink wink* Sorry…too much?
 
are you going to homecoming with him (yes I KNOW who he is)
Basically yes, but he hasn’t officially asked yet. I’ll keep you updated.
 
And that’s all I have for you folks. If you want more posts like this one, go ahead and ask on my ask.fm page. LINKED HERE I answer most questions about myself, but I’l give silly answers and advice too. Oh and philosophical ones. Go ahead and try me. It’d make me happy. Also, read some of my other posts and see if you like em! I hope you do! Well that’s all for now. I really gotta make that burrito.
 
Your Obliging Blogger,
 
Sabrina
 
 

Happy Autumn!

Heyhey all you bloggers of the world!

Just came online to say howdy doo! Not sure if I have all too much to say, but my laptop is so annoying and laggy. I’m gonna have to blame it on the internet memory it takes to store this group chat that I’ve had on Facebook since the beginning of summer vacation We’re at about 107k messages so far. Pretty impressive, right? Well I think so. That chat has made the participants that much closer though. Like it’s me, my chica and my hombre. We all have batman names that I will from now on use as their code names. The chica is Alfred…..Hm… I know that it’s a boy’s name, but bear with me. And the hombre’s name is batman…. Yeah. Now ain’t he special? I’m Catwoman, but that’s besides the point. Anyway, we’re all hecka close now and batman has a joke that he’s lampzoned. Yeah…it’s wayy past brozoned But it makes things comfy. We can talk about anything with him! And by we, I mean Alfred and me. And Alfred is a girl….wow, this could get confusing.

Anyways, I didn’t get any likes on my last post. And that makes me sad. That’s probably because I didn’t put in any of the tags before I pushed publish….amateur mistake, eh?

After school today, I was hanging around and a bunch of my friends tried to do stacked push-ups. (I have such buff friends) So basically how this worked, is one guy would get in push-up position, and then another guy would get on top of him with their hands on the first guys ankles and feet on their shoulders and then they would simultaneously do push ups. Not sure if I described that quite right, but it was pretty impressive. Because they had to stay balanced too. I think the record was like 5 push-ups. But that in itself was pretty impressive. I doubt they could’ve done much more. But of course this is coming from me and I can barely do 5 without someone on my back. Kidding..kinda…maybe..

I’m having a bad hair day. Gosh dang it. Is it weird that  actually say “gosh dang it” out loud Like I never curse. In English today, our teacher was telling us about interjections and she says “It’s like…what you say when you stub your toe. ‘Gosh dang it'” and then she begins to laugh “Just kidding. we all know that’s not what you guys would say…” And I’m just sitting in the back of the room thinking…”Yes….that’s totally what I would say. And what I do say…all the time.” Eh. Just makes me more polite than everyone who curses….right? right? Anyone? Oh hold up, this screen isn’t set to reply to me. But you readers out there, what are your thoughts? I AM SO GOSH DANG DESPERATE FOR COMMENTS! (And there I go saying gosh dang again…)

Which of course brings me to my next point. We were in science class and we were talking about a nearby lake as opposed to the one we saw on our hike last week (see last post if you actually want more details….) And she says “This lake is natural whereas our lake is dammed.” Being the mature teenagers we are, we all giggle and them my friend and I get into a banter that goes a long the lines of “To get to the dammed lake, you gotta rive on the dam road and cross the dam bridge and when you’re there, you gotta use the dam bathroom and maybe go to the dam vendors to buy some dam snack if you’re hungry. Then go to thedam giftshop to buy some dam souvenirs to remember your dam trip.” Now aren’t we clever…I’m pretty sure a few of those didn’t even make sense. I felt like such a bad egg. Woah there. Language.

OH! For those of you who care…the cheeseburger was awesome. OMNOMNOM. I’m so carnivorous. And I’m sorry if that was offensive to anyone. *Gasp* I’m sorry!

This weather is weird, but you know what? This means I get to start wearing jeans again! and..*drumroll* SWEATSHIRTS. Yes, my friends, it’s Sweatshirt Season! I’m a total dork for being happy about this, but I can’t help it. I am. I get to wear comfy clothes and no one can judge me because it’s cold. So ha! Such it fashion!

In other news, it’s getting late and my parents aren’t home. I should probably a) start on homework b) make some dinner and c) tidy up a bit. Anyone who knows anything about me knows what order that’s going to be done in. Well I’m off to make myself a burrito. Hope you all enjoyed this post! As always, like comment and follow if you did. It would bring a little nerdy girl joy…..Wow. Yeah that was to all you primarily pedophilic blog stalkers out there. Well either way, ask me a question on my ask.fm and I will answer it asap! The link is here—-> CLICK HERE ON THESE WORDS. Well I hope you all have an amazing day!

Your favorite Catwoman Impersonator,

Sabrina

When September Ends

Heyo Chickadees (and whatever the male form of that is),

So it just dawned on me…..It’s the last day of September. And you know what else?? The last time I posted was in…..AUGUST! Sheesh. Has it really gotten to the point where I struggle to update even once a month. Goodness gracious. I sure am sorry.

On the other hand, I have some really great news! ….*insert drumroll here* I GOT ENGAGED. Yup. It was in between 3rd and 4th period today… She didn’t get down on one knee, but she proposed and gave me the ring. Needless to say, I said yes. I SAID YES! We haven’t planned out all the details, but I’m assuming we’re gonna wait til it’s legal to have the wedding. Hopefully she doesn’t bailed Or else I already know the title of my autobiography… “Left at the Alter” Men…can’t count on them for poop. Yes. That was very clearly censored.

In other news, my brother is back at college. He left last Monday. Sure I miss him, but one thing I’m not missing is the never ending game of lets-see-who-can-leave-the-least-amount-of-paper-on-the-toilet-paper-roll-so-I-make-the-next-person-have-to-change-the-roll. Hm…Maybe we need to work on naming our games. I shall rename it…..Lazy Lavatorators. That’s sooo not a word. I’m also not missing having to share my car with him…. Eh. Who am I kidding. We all know I’m already missing him like crazy. It’s okay. I got all the pics and videos from this summer.

So when was the last time you had a field trip? Depending on how old you are and what level of education  you’re at, that answer will vary. We had one last week on Tuesday for AP Environmental Science and AP Biology. I think it’s safe to say that it was the best school day of my entire high school career so far. And if you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know I’ve had some pretty awesome days. So the whole trip was just me and 5 friends got in a car and drove to a mountain where we hiked 10 miles up this BEAUTIFUL mountain and the weather was perfect. Surrounded by friends just having a good time. Taking tons of pictures of course. My fully charged camera died halfway up the mountain. Then when we got to the top, we just hung out and ate lunch and it was just super awesome. The lady who drove us up was super cool and gave us candy. More specifically, fireballs. I don’t know how many of you have tried these, and out of those who have, how many actually like em. But  LOVE them. Which is weird because they make your mouth feel funny if you eat too many at once, which I almost always do. She also let us blast the Pokemon Theme Song and Lost Woods Dubstep Remix (Twilight) in the car ride there and back. And of course everyone in our particular car group brought their Nintendo DS’s so we could play Pokemon in the car. Goodness it was a good day. Here’s a picture of the amazing view:

20130930-171454.jpg

Well Also, Homecoming is coming up and I’ve been trying to convince all my friends to go. A lot of my friends are actually Seniors this year and it’s going to be the last dance I can actually be with them in, so I think it’s pretty important that I go. Pus I actually like dances Call me cray. But I’m Sabrina…And we already knew I’m crazy. I already bought my dress and I’m excitedddd. And of course I have to be signed up for a PSAT earlier that day. Eh. Oh well It’ll be a ice treat after the hard work. Hopefully I don’t pass out on the dance floor from sleep deprivation. Oh who am I kidding, I’m always sleep deprived and I’ve never passed out….or at least not that any of you should know about *wink wink* I actually have no idea where I was going with that.

I don’t have a great deal of homework today, but my parents are taking me out for cheeseburger and I’m super excited!! YAYY! Well I guess that means I should get going. Hope you all liked this post If you did, you should follow me, because yeah…I’m always like this. And if you didn’t like it…well Haters gonna hate, but I’m just gonna keep on doin me. So yeah. Like, Follow, Comment and if you wanna, you can ask me a question on my ask.fm page and I will get around to answering them in another post. Don’t worry if you asked one a while ago and it still hasn’t been answered, I’m trying to accumulate a lot. So here’s the link—->LINKLINKLINK. Love you all tons and I’ll try to post more later!

Mrs. MIA,

Sabrina